Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Cannot be Contained

Holy Schmegaygee! I think I have said (more than once) "it's not that hard being a parent, I don't know what all the fuss is about." And, I'm sure that comment was offensive to many people. But, let me assure you--I officially know what all the fuss is about. Before, it was never that Maizey was hard, it's that I was lazy and scattered. Now, it's her. Well, it's a combo of her being crazy and me being lazy. Okay, if you are a parent to a child who isn't yet mobile, look away. Here I go: crawling changed my life, it took something joyous and turned it into something joyous/chaotic. Now, to add insult to injury, Maizey is getting all 4 of her top teeth at once. She doesn't sleep, she doesn't sit still, and she screams if you try to contain her. Wanna take a shower? Yeah right. I can't leave her while I shower because her naps are so unpredictable lately and she won't sleep in her crib for more than 20 mins, so I have to leave her on the bed. I have a video monitor that I can watch, but let me tell you from experience, watching her wake up while you are lathered in the shower and having to bolt out soapy and wet sucks. I used to take her little bathtub into the shower with me and she'd peacefully hang out in her tub while I hygienated (I doubt this is a word), she even sometimes fell asleep in her bathtub (I know that is a crazy combo of bizarre and dangerous, but it worked). Now, if I take her in the shower with me she climbs out of her tub, and if I just let her sit on the floor of the shower she is OBSESSED with licking/chewing the shower curtain, which is disgusting on an infinite number of levels.

Today was the melting point for me. She nevers goes to sleep without serious drama--and this morning was about to be drama free. Today, after a leaky diaper (which NEVER happens when she is wearing a cloth diaper, but she was in a disposable this morning) a morning shower was necessary because last nights' dinner was smooshed all up her back. So we took a shower, had her 3rd outfit change, a bottle, and she was asleep--EASY! Well, she was asleep for a minute. Approximately one minute after she drifted off, someone came to the door, and my a-hole dog went berserk. She woke up and then I went crazy! I was so mad I was kicking the air around Porter, then he moved and I actually, accidentally, kicked him. I went from mad to devastated. I felt so bad for kicking my poor, cancer-ridden, loyal and protective dog. It was an accident, but it was such an example of the state of meltdown I am living in. School is totally kicking my ass, the baby doesn't sleep (but does scream), and changing the kitty litter was my top priority for the last 2 days (but I didn't get it done until today), and Ryan is getting dressed out of the laundry basket--at least it's clean laundry.

Okay, now that you all think I am an abusive animal owner, let me assure you, I am staying positive (with the help of a pep talk from Ryan). My baby is the cutest/silliest thing in the world, I have the most supportive family, and I'm going to be getting my dream car in the not-too-distant future (yes, the Volvo won out for a long list of reasons that I will get to in another post). This part of parenthood is really hard, but really rewarding. She can stand on her own for like 10-15 seconds at a time, and she balances herself with her arms like she is on a surf board, all with this giant, proud grin. It makes all of it worthwhile.

Oh, she weighed in at 17.5lbs and 28.5inches at her doc's visit last week. She's 10inches longer than she was when she was born. She's really growing up!

I don't really have any new photos to post. Here are a few and a video of her enjoying her Xmas gift from her great grammy (I can't get the video to post, but I will try again later).


This is a picture I took of Maizey while I was pondering how to remove a poop-soaked onesie. Onesies go over the head, and there was a lot of prep to be sure that Maize didn't end up with excrement in her hair.



I may have posted these photos already, I can't remember. Anyway, I thought that they were so cute it wouldn't matter. Ryan with Maizey and Jack at Jessica's Christmas party.

This was pre-crawling. She crawled the next day.


Oh, as you may see, the title of my blog changed again. As Good as it Gets is one of my favorite movies, and the quote is from the movie. I've always loved that quote and I say it all the time, that movie packed full of great one-liners.
Okay, I got it finally! She loves this car and it's
exhausting!

32 comments:

Erika said...

She's so big. I miss her.

Unknown said...

LAZY YOU ARE NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!:) smart, caring, loving, priorities first my love........

Mo said...

I'm enjoying my last days of a non-mobile baby. Last night Emilie seemed to be figuring out how to rock and scootch back and forth, so it's just a matter of time before she puts two and two together to crawl. Yikes!!

Hang in there Lana- you are doing great. You have a happy & fun baby which clearly means you are a good mom!

Erika said...

Okay that picture of the poo is disgusting!!!!!!

Unknown said...

great! )))

Unknown said...

Congratulations! You've made Blogger's Blog of Note list. I love this post. I don't have kids, and I'm not sure I could handle it, so you have my respect!

mama_tothe_2ndpower said...

I loved this blog, totally awesome because it's all the truth. My son was the EXACT same way when he teethed and started getting more mobile. It does get better, thank goodness huh? Parents go to amazing strengths so laziness should not even BE in your vocabulary! It's hard being a parent, very emotionally and physically demanding all the time. But like you said, parenthood is the most rewarding thing ever and it sucks we don't get freaggin gold medals for it.

Brit-Chick Writing Brit-Flick said...

Loved your bump pics, I have similiar ones although I looked far more whale like. Enjoyed reading your post

Just Jules said...

Oh, how you bring back memories. Our wee ones are so close together we always had two in diapers and or teething at the same time! ahhhhhh.... I thought for sure I would lose my mind (I did part of it) However, you start to change and they are always changing... it just starts to come together, and then they change phases again.... never ending!

Oh, I have several tips on how to solve dilemmas like the poopy diaper/onsie thing - you will too soon!
Congrats on Blog of Note

Khaled KEM said...

I feel that you are telling me my life lately. Me and my wife share the same you were just mentioned.
My son is not crawling yet but we have the suspicion that he is teething!

lmt1073 said...

Your story had me laughing so hard my Dr. Pepper almost came out my nose! You have a beautiful baby girl and I know from experience how hard the days can be, but it's when they are asleep you can't remember the bad behaviour...

Tami said...

Try teething tablets. (I can't remember the brand name but you could ask a pharmacist.) They dissolve in the baby's mouth so you don't have to put goop on your finger and get it everywhere but the sore places. They worked like a charm for my babies. But I'm sure a lot of the screaming is because she wants to do more than she can.

Unknown said...

Congrats for blog of note :)
Loved that post, it made me laugh...and I realized that I am not the only one! I have a 9 month old fiesty, sassy, little thing... who is going through all sorts of changes right now!
How old is Maizey?? I didn't see anywhere in your blog where it said her age.
Thanks for your blog

Unknown said...

ps Hylands Teething Tablets, at walgreens in the baby section... Your baby cannot overdose on them they are homeopathic, lifesavers!

MrsVladdevlor said...

Hi, I came across your blog and really enjoyed it. My baby started to crawl a bit late so I got to enjoy my "quiet" time for a while...And now she's following me everywhere I go! They grow up so fast...

Christina! said...

I read this, and sighed. My child crawled at 5 months and walked at 8 months... and I thought THAT was bad.

Now he's rolling into the terrible two's.... it's wayyyyyyy worse

anglshaz said...

my love, hard to me a sprem or egg donor it is not hard to be a parent it most definately is!!fair duce

Iluska Ikeda said...

My baby is still only 3 months old, but she already sounds like yours (unpredictable naps, won't stay on the crib, etc). I can't imagine when she starts teething!

ps.: I love the Moby too!

Funtabulous said...

Hey Lana

I am a new blogger> I am yet to even understand how to go abt it...and i found your blog in the blog of note.I can really understand the melt down....I near it every morning.....sending my 61/2 yr old to school, hubby to work and a 15 month old choosing to get up that very moment...and the crib thing....it was like someone was tellin my life out there....enjoy your motherhood..like everyone says everything seems worth it with that cute smile u get

Miranda said...

I don't remember how I found your blog, but I had to add it to my list and come back later to read it. I have a 2 year old. Just wait it gets better! Your blog sounded just like me a year or so ago. Everyone told me "oh its soo fun when they crawl!" I say "No no its not, I liked when my boy just rolled a lot" Wonderful blog!
Thank you for sharing!

gibbousmoonrising said...

The image of you kicking at the dog but not meaning to hit him made me laugh because its exactly what I did to my cats when they miowed too loud when my baby was napping a few months ago (and I was going through a stressful week, obviously). Those moggies were the apple of my eye before my gorgeous daughter came along, and I still love them but I'm less tolerant of some of their more irritating habits now. Poor things. Parenthood is a rollercoaster of a journey but I do love it... I will keep checking in here...

Victoria said...

LOL! I know I shouldn't be laughing,but I just couldn't help it. My baby will be crawling and she is already teething, so I hope I remember how funny I thought your post was when I'm going nuts.

Anonymous said...

I love your blog! You shower curtain story made me laugh a whole lot. I love the way to talk about motherhood; that is without saying that it's paradise. It's really down-to-earth and I can recognize myself, even though I'm not a mother yet ;)

I'm definitely going to follow you :)

Leesa said...

Just wanted to say your baby is beautiful. They grow up so fast. Enjoy every single moment.
I am a new blogger and just found your blog. I absolutely loved it. Memories...

Michael Lockridge said...

Have you gotten to the "If you think this is bad, wait until they are...(enter some other age here)" comments? It goes on forever. I mean, forever. My kids are in their late 20's and early 30's, and those comments finally went away.

I have discovered through following blogs that I really LOVE the family blogs, such as your own. Thanks so much for sharing, and congratulations on the Blog of Note.

Mike
shortstoriesbymlockridge.blogspot.com

Flabbergasted said...

I've had my share of meltdowns, a ton of squished up poop in onesies as well, and I've been peed on as well by my three kids. I've also had to clean poop off of walls do to the kids shooting out poop while I was changing their diapers on the changing table. Fun times they were. LOL

Cheryl Pitt said...

Congrats on being a blog of note! Just wanted to say hi, I'm a cloth diaper-er too and only have leaks in disposables. I must say I think you handled it all well :)

JayneDoh said...

Congratulations on BON. Your blog is great. Mine is now 8 and it could be my story you're telling. FYI - wait till she's 6 and comes home telling you she has a boyfriend ... be well.

Shari said...

I have been where you are. This is where mother guilt is born! My daughter was having the same problem and solved it by getting this pretty (but strong) net dome that attaches to the crib. You unzip it to get to the baby. It not only looks cute, it contains child in crib for the critical time it takes to calm down and go to sleep or take that shower. I don't know what it is called, but my daughter still has the box and was talking about selling it online (cheap). At first my little granddaughter (about 15 months old maybe) wanted to get in. Then when she found out she was contained, she freaked out a little. In the end, she would go to the crib and ask to be put in and try to zip it closed herself. Good luck! Motherhood is a lot of work, but as you mentioned, it's not rocket science. Good intentions go a long way! Grandma and mom who has been there!

Red Flashlight said...

Hilarious! I know I know - I should not be enjoying the suffering of others. But you're funny! So keep it up. We need a good laugh once in a while. Chewing on the shower curtain? Utterly disgusting and hilarious.

I found your blog because Google made you a "blog of note," by the way.

shotx said...

I feel your pain. I got a daughter that is 13 months old. As it gets better, it gets worse...so to say. But it's the best time of my life. There is no such thing as routine when it comes to kids.

Coachdad said...

congrats on being a blog of note!! And welcome to the club on knowing what all the fuss is about!