A few things...

So, most importantly, Maizey has been sleeping through the night. Yes, seriously. Last night she slept from 11pm until 6:45am!!! The night before that she did about 6.5 hours. This is a really big deal since she has been really cranky in the evening/nights. Last night was the worst to date, she screamed nearly inconsolably from 5pm to about 10:30pm--and to add insult to injury, I was alone (Ryan was golfing). But, I managed to squeeze in a run on the treadmill. Which brings me to my next point. I am going to run my first competition in July. I am announcing this to make sure that you all hold me accountable. It shouldn't be too difficult, it's just a 5k which I can almost do now, but it'll be a good motivator for me. I need to get back into the swing of the things so I'll be in shape for the Sea-Gals tryouts next April! ;-)

Maizey had her 2nd laser treatment last week. I didn't really know what those treatments were for, and I still don't really. I just know that they aren't really going to change the appearance of her hemangioma. But, we started her on a 4 week course of oral steroids to stop the growth. The steroids even decrease the growth about a third of the time, I'm hoping that she will fall into that group, but only time will tell. There aren't too many side affects from such a short regimen on steroids, but it can decrease her immune system slightly, so don't take it personally if I make you wash your hands or avoid you altogether if you're sick :-)!!! Her hemangioma has begun to ulcerate (when it opens up and there are sores). This can be pretty painful and we need to keep ointment on it at all times. If she doesn't respond to treatment and the ulcerations don't heal we'll have to get really aggressive, but I don't anticipate that.

Other than that, not much else to report. Here are some pics from last Thursday and Friday:

Maizey enjoying some pack'n'play time.

A blissful moment. My cousin Carmen and her new baby Jackson with Maizey and I at Greenlake.
Maizey and Jackson. Can you believe they're only 3 weeks apart??? But, he was 2 weeks late and she was 3 weeks early, so they're more like 8 weeks apart.Maizey blowing bubbles.Maizey and Grandma.
Maizey and Great Grandma.
Here she is sticking out her tongue at the camera.

Typing one-handed while I nurse...

So I'm going to try to get to bed at a reasonable hour tonight, which means I'll be making this brief.

Here is what I want to say: I never knew it was like this--even though everyone always talks about it. I guess you just have to experience it yourself. I've never loved anyone/thing like this. Even though this new job of mine can be challenging, I've never felt so much joy. I've never experienced a day where my heart soared so often, as it does now. Every moment of this journey has been amazing, but these last days have been especially poignant. My bond with Ms. Maize grows exponentially with each new day. It's overwhelming and cathartic. She is smiling, and not like before, in the last 48 hours her smiles went from occasional to provokable (is that a word??). It's the cutest thing ever. Then she'll smile and coo at the same time and it's like the beginnings of laughter. She is realizing that she can reach for and touch the things she sees, which delights her to no end. Her hair is growing back in and it's spiky and adorable. She is finally in her cloth diapers and they give her this big, pear-shaped butt that is literally the cutest thing I've ever seen. Oh yeah, I'm sure she is over the 9lb mark by now.

So, I'm going to share 2 things since now I'm waiting for baby to be asleep enough to come out of the moby and go into the sleep sack. First, I want to share some of my favorite poems/thoughts from my favorite poet/thoughtist artist Brian Andreas. They've taken on new meaning since Maizey it there aren't many people who can express these mushy emotions quite like him. Then, I'm going to share some pictures.

The Wonder of it All:
Sitting there in your pajamas & all the time in the world & if I could keep any moment it would be this: watching you & holding my breath with the wonder of it all.

Almost Beyond:
She laid on my chest & her breathing filled me almost to beyond what I could hold.

Laughter and Noise:
There are lives I can imagine without children but none of them have the same laughter & noise.

Photos:

This was at Children's for her ultrasound today.Grandma trying to get a burp out of Maizey in the doctor's office.Here she is in the middle of rolling over tonight.This is Maizey realizing that she can reach for things and feel them.This is a little smile from my beautiful baby.'Nuff said.Um, these are water shoes from Grammy--for all those long walks on the beach this summer?????Perfect and asleep.This series of pictures is from 6/12 and taken by Auntie Erika.

OOH. I'll try to post a video from tonight of me feeding Maizey her toys. Um, all the experts say it's the best way for little babies to learn since their mouths are so crucial in their exploration (and yes that is the best way I could word that sentence--I tried many other alternatives).

The Dance

So by "the dance" I mean the last hours (hour [singular] if I'm lucky) before Maizey goes to sleep for the night--and by "night" I mean the period from about 11pm to 4am. The dance begins with the final change for the night, then there is the is-this- a-good-night-or-is-this-a-bad-night five or so minutes. If it's good she falls asleep in minutes, if it's bad, all hell breaks loose. Tonight is a bad night. The dance began around 9:30pm and it continues now at 12:53am. The good news is that we're nearing the end--the part where she appears to be totally passed out, but then all the sudden throws her head back for no apparent reason. If I move too soon and try to conclude the dance, it could be all over and we could have to start over again. I must be able to move Maizey out of the Bjorn or Moby and into her swaddle sack then into her cradle--it's a risky maneuver with even the sleepiest of babies. I've learned that motherhood is just a series of weighing out options--if I move Maizey too soon, then she wakes up and I have to start all over. But, if I risk it and try to move her when it appears that the coast may have cleared then I could, potentially, get those precious extra moments of sleep. You see my dilemma. So, anyway, while you're all asleep, snuggled warmly in bed, dream of me -blogging- and longing for that special moment each night/very early morning, where I get to put my tightly swaddled bambina (I just call her Bambi for short) into her cradle and get to fall into bed and cozy into the warmth of a job well done--for about the next four hours.

I'm happy to report that Ms. Maizey is tuckered out and tucked in for the night/morning.

This is satisfaction/relief.

I'll post some new pics hopefully tomorrow. I would do it now, but that would mean less sleep for poor, old, me.

The cutest video ever...

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Great News

The coolest baby on the block. Rockin' her edgy-baby hat from Auntie Erika.
Well, I've got some pretty good news. I got on the scale a couple of days ago and saw that I was only 5lbs away from my pre-pregnancy weight. Yay! So, I thought I'd do it...I decided to try on my most expensive jeans that I bought last summer and only got to wear a handful of times before I got pregnant. And, hallelujah, they fit! Now, by "fit" I mean I can get them zipped and buttoned. I did attempt to wear them on Saturday and after a meal and some grocery shopping, I was pretty uncomfortable--I unbuttoned them when I got in the car. So I guess I still have some work to do, but this was a good motivator and should help me get rid of those last little pounds. Breast feeding is not only good for the baby, it's good for the mother--it gets rid of all those "I'm pregnant I can eat it" extra pounds. Here I am in all my glory:

Maizey updates:

Maize had her little surgery last week and she did so well! They put her pacifier in some sugar water (I guess the sugar releases endorphins) and just cried for a few seconds when they zapped her little spot. There isn't any noticeable improvement-yet. The doc said it takes a couple treatments to start noticing a difference. Our next treatment is next week and then another one in 3 weeks.

Maizey girl turned into Maizey little-old-balding-man a couple weeks ago. The only hair she had left was around the sides of her head and a little patch of bangs. In the last few days we've seen a lot of growth back on top. She looks like her daddy right now with just the short stubble.

Her "colic" thing is still going on, but we're managing it a lot better. I don't think that it can be considered colic after all. She cries much less than 3 hours a day--maybe more like 1 hour total. Also, we've learned that all it takes is some time on the exercise ball bouncing up and down or some Moby time.

She graduated out of preemie and into newborn diapers. We're hoping to get into her cloth diapers in the next few weeks. With the way she is gaining weight, that shouldn't be a problem.

PHOTOS!!!!

We'll call this her first AFTER shot.


Maizey playing with Allie.



I know I've got a lot of carseat shots, but they're so cute. Grammy Jan said Maize looked like a peapod in this outfit--so sweet!

The loves of my life.

God's gift to mothers (besides, of course, the baby)...

I just want to quickly comment on the Moby wrap prior to getting into meatier topics. The Moby wrap is God's gift to moms. I know it's simple, it's just a long piece of fabric, many cultures have been using this same setup to carry their babies for thousands of years, ours was just a little late to get on board. When Maizey is screaming (which seems to be often these days) I put her into the Moby and after some resistance at first, I get a sleepy and happy baby that is cuddled onto my chest for hours. Not to mention it's awfully conducive to hands-free parenting. I can wash dishes, blog, pee, what have you, all while she is wrapped up and asleep.

Meatier topics:

Laser Surgery Tomorrow!

So, little Miss Maizey went and saw the Pediatric Dermatologist yesterday. The good news is that the doctor we saw is really intelligent and aggressive (she's been a vascular anomaly specialist at Children's for 15 years). The bad news is Maizey, the poor little pumpkin, has to have laser surgery treatments--probably 3 or so. The first treatment is tomorrow. There is no sedation or anything like that, which is a relief for me, so she'll be awake for the procedure. She'll have to have her eyes covered with patches and we'll have to hold her head still so I know she'll be screaming at the top of her lungs (what a weird expression?? vs the bottom of her lungs, which are much quieter??). Plus, the procedure hurts, they equate it to being snapped with a rubber band over and over--no thanks. She reassured me that infants tend to forget immediately and that she'll be feeling fine as soon as the procedure is done (it takes about 15 min). The surgeries will help to slow the growth of the hemangioma down, but won't fix it entirely. There will be some sort of steroid regimen (either taken orally or injected at the site) in the future. Steroids are really good at stopping tumor (which technically this is) growth and can even shrink it. It seems like it's all over kill, but the doc informed me that with these types of growths there can be a lot of scarring if there is no intervention. Plus, it's starting to push up on her lower eyelid. It's encouraging to know that we won't have to deal with this beyond about one year of age since these things tend to involute and go away about that time anyway.

Phew, I'm glad I got all that out.

Moving right along. My little bambina is BIG. She weighed in today at a whopping 7lbs 11oz! To think she was only 4lbs 10oz 5 weeks ago is NUTS! She's growing out of her preemie clothes, which makes me so happy that she is growing, but so sad that she won't be able to wear some of my favorite little outfits anymore. I know that my future niece Harper is already set for clothes, but she might be having some more come her way! Anyway, taking Maizey's prematurity into account, she is still only in the 5th percentile...oh except for her HUGE noggin, which puts her into the whopping 25th percentile. She got the big Gebow head. Big head equals big brain.

Here are some recent photos and some from today. I'll post some AFTER shots of her hemagioma tomorrow or the next day.

Here we are just a few minutes ago, getting ready to blog. Maizey is in her Moby wrap...God's gift to mamas.

Maizey's Before shot taken today 6/3.

Maizey is so dang cute. Here we are today after a bottle.

My new favorite way to nap. Maizey seems to like it too!

My second favorite invention after the Moby. It's a sleep sack AND a swaddle blanket in one, and it's made swaddling her for night time SOSOSO much easier!

This is Maize passed out in her car seat with her pacifier hanging out of her mouth and her hands just so. She's very elegant with her little hands. My future ballerina--or woodworker I suppose.

Memorial Day and Milestones...

I know it's been too long since my last post, but this motherhood thing is sort of time consuming, who knew? Maizey has been really busy growing like crazy and hitting all sorts of milestones. Today I got on my drugstore scale (a hint to its reliability) with Maizey and then without and according to the scale she is 8lbs!! Okay okay, I know that is probably not what she weighs, but I'm sure she has to be in the 7s by now. As far as I'm concerned, either the baby IS 8lbs, or my scale is telling ME I weigh more than I actually do--it's a win win situation if you ask me. Anyway, I know she's heavier because my arm starts to ache after I hold her for a while, which is definitely a new sensation. I'll know for sure on Wednesday at her 6 week checkup and I'll pass that info along ASAP.

Other milestones have been hit, whether or not they were intentional on Maizey's part, I'll never know. She rolls over, yes, my 5.5week old rolls over. She can roll from her back to her stomach, or her stomach to her back. It's not like this has happened once or twice, it happens almost anytime I lay her down when she is wide awake. We went to a BBQ at Jon and Georgia's on Saturday night and she must have rolled over 5 or so times. My little over achiever. She is also doing really well at holding up her head. She can hold it up for at least 20 seconds at a time. She is learning that she has a little voice and starting to "talk" and coo. It's the sweetest sound ever. She's still smiling and more and more people are getting to see it. It's the cutest smile I've ever seen and it makes my heart soar (for lack of a less cheeseball expression) every time I see it. She still loves showers and baths, and she even loves the hairdryer.

She took her first journey to Tahuya for Memorial Day weekend. We had a blast! We only intended to stay until Sunday night, but decided to prolong the trip until Monday morning because we were having so much fun and the dogs weren't being total assholes (by dogs I mean Porter--not Louise since she is always pleasant). Maizey did really well too. She slept well and tolerated being held by many new people better than I could have hoped. She even tolerated the long drive in holiday weekend traffic. We went for walks, took the dogs swimming, and pot lucked with the family. I'm looking forward to many weekends with her in Tahuya.

The other milestone (if you can call it that) is the "is-she-just-cranky-or-do-I-have-a-colicky-baby" milestone. From about 5-10pm (aka the Witching Hour) she gets cranky (and by cranky I mean she screams almost inconsolably) almost every night. Last night she went nearly non-stop from 6:30-10pm, she lost her little voice at the end and just sort of whimpered, which was super cute in a really unfortunate way. It's frustrating, but mostly it's just really hard to know she is so upset and there isn't anything we can do. I was a responsible parent and read "Happiest Baby on the Block" before she was born, but even the 5 S's can't help my baby. We manage okay through it and just stay positive, I'm hoping that last night is the worst it will ever be, so far we can't say she has colic. A colic diagnosis requires 3 hours of screaming for 3 days a week for 3 weeks in a row. Before yesterday she had never cried more than about an hour a day. Time will tell...

The last update I will give (and then I gotta run 'cause my baby smells gamey) is about Maizey's appointment that she has with a Pediatric Dermatologist tomorrow morning. She has a red hemangioma birthmark by her right eye that is growing like crazy...it's almost doubled in size in 3 weeks! I think it adds character to her beautiful face, like the beauty marks made famous by Marilyn Monroe and Cindy Crawford, but because it's so close to her eye, it could begin pushing up on her lower lid and obstruct her vision. These birthmarks always go away on their own (usually by 2 years old), but they can increase in size before they go away. There is a good chance that we'll have to have it removed with laser surgery. I don't know what is involved in that (whether it's general anesthesia or what), but I'll have a much better idea after tomorrow. I can't think of anything harder than having to put your little one "under."

Okay Maizey is now awake and free time is officially over.

At the cabin after Maizey's lunch.
Maizey in the Moby on her first walk in Tahuya.
This is what Ryan and Jim did all weekend, this and drink.

Maizey in bloom!
Taking her morning nap in Uncle Brion's sleeping bag. This sounds like a SIDS what-not-to-do, but we were there with her the whole time.
Enjoying the weather while daddy enjoys technology in Tahuya.
Taking a nap on Grandma.

Just plain cute.
The only proof I have that she rolls over, this is a split second before she did it!
Mama and crazy eyes Maizey.
Trying to cool off from a hot day in Tahuya.
An up close shot of Maizey in the Moby.